Wednesday, April 3, 2013

OPEN MOUTH, INSERT FOOT






William Shatner's Gonzo Ballet (2009)

This had to be the scariest thing I've seen this year. Netflix put this on display as an April Fool's joke and like a fool I dared someone to dare ME to watch it. I should have held out for the double-dog dare.

How to describe this? Well, it's 50 minutes long.




Oh, not enough? All right, actually it's NOT the ballet itself. It's worse. It's the creators of the ballet describing how it came about. Really. For 50 minutes. That's 3,000 seconds worth of William Shatner pontificating how he allowed his album 'Has Been' to become a ballet - even if he wasn't going to get paid for it. It was performed by an actual ballet company, with music provided in part by Ben Folds and some spoken lyrics (you know Shatner can't sing) provided by.... uh.... provided by.... <face reddens> provided by Henry Rollins.

There were examples,  both of some of the - you really can't call them songs but I guess since they're on an album Shatner thinks they're songs, plus snippets of the dancers doing their interpretation of Shatner's great wisdom and pithy observations. Excuse me, I'll be right back <sounds of violent vomiting>  eh, must have eaten something bad, sorry about that.

I think I need to lie down.



                                

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