Gli Orrori Del Castello Di Norimberga
(The Horrors Of The
Castle Of Nuremberg)
Baron Blood (1972) Italian
Two years before Mario Bava would use Elke in a neat story-turned-ugly-debacle Lisa And The Devil (or as the US crudmakers called it, The House Of Exorcism) there was this neat gothic tale set in Austria (with, of course, more than one title). Yes, true to Bava style we get really lavish sets with lots of detail. In this particular movie I have to applaud the use of lighting and shadow. And you know Bava loves his cobwebs... tons and tons of cobwebs. For some reason though this was one of his less successful movies. If I were to set blame, it would be the acting, including Elke I'm afraid (although she did get to have over a dozen costume changes I swear).
Characters were just not that believable, we had the typical little-girl-knows-everything-but-everyone-ignores-her type of thing that drives me nuts, and the know-it-all American college graduate was dumb as a post. Okay okay, so the story was a bit thin too - but the locations were still impressive and hey, in the 1970's the world wasn't nearly as small as it is now, so people didn't get to see these kinds of locales except in movies such as this one.
So the basic story around all this neat stuff to look at is the aforementioned dumb as a post American college student who is visiting Austria to learn of his ancestors, one in particular - a character so nasty he rivaled Vlad The Impaler, called Baron Blood by the locals. The castle he resided in is now being renovated into a hotel for tourists, since locals still won't go near it after dark. This dummy has brought with him a parchment of his grandfather's - apparently the Baron was finally bound by a witch, tortured and killed. She was then burned at the stake (sounds fair to me). The parchment has the original curse because she wanted him to be taken from his grave to be tortured over and over again, so it also has a part that sends him back. So he meets a young woman who's helping renovate the place and although they've known each other what, five minutes? He asks her to meet him there at night to invoke the incantation.
I'm really sorry about that but if I didn't get it out I'd go insane from it running around my head. So they do, lots of spooky sounds start, they chicken out, say the return incantation and leave. But dumb dumb can't resist trying again. And it works... we see a nasty, bleeding (Really? After centuries?) character dig out from his grave, leaving pools of blood wherever he goes. And they can't put him back 'cause oops, the parchment falls in the fireplace. Damn. The first place he goes is to the doctor (Okay there are some massive duhs to this story) who cleans him up (He's a walking bleeding baked potato for crying out loud!) before he's killed.
This dark spooky chick has the amulet of the witch who first condemned the Baron (How convenient! How thoughtful! How... impossible!) and says the ones he's destroyed have the power to destroy him. Long story short (too late) they're lured back to the castle and just about done for when Elke accidentally drops the amulet on the body of a guy he put in a coffin shaped iron maiden - his eyes open and the Baron starts to look as if he's in pain. The dead man gets up and oh goody, a little zombie action - all those he's killed come into the dungeon and start to... well, we're not shown what but it must be bad 'cause he's screaming louder than his recording...
(The Horrors Of The
Castle Of Nuremberg)
Baron Blood (1972) Italian
Two years before Mario Bava would use Elke in a neat story-turned-ugly-debacle Lisa And The Devil (or as the US crudmakers called it, The House Of Exorcism) there was this neat gothic tale set in Austria (with, of course, more than one title). Yes, true to Bava style we get really lavish sets with lots of detail. In this particular movie I have to applaud the use of lighting and shadow. And you know Bava loves his cobwebs... tons and tons of cobwebs. For some reason though this was one of his less successful movies. If I were to set blame, it would be the acting, including Elke I'm afraid (although she did get to have over a dozen costume changes I swear).
Characters were just not that believable, we had the typical little-girl-knows-everything-but-everyone-ignores-her type of thing that drives me nuts, and the know-it-all American college graduate was dumb as a post. Okay okay, so the story was a bit thin too - but the locations were still impressive and hey, in the 1970's the world wasn't nearly as small as it is now, so people didn't get to see these kinds of locales except in movies such as this one.
And here's something cool, it spawned an urban legend called The Well To Hell (an urban legend mind you, I don't want to start seeing it all over my Facebook page): Supposedly seismologists in Siberia had, on tape, actual recordings of the sounds of Hell of yells and screams from those, uh, frying I guess. The hoax was that it was a remixed portion of the soundtrack of Baron Blood with added effects. Can't have been that awful if it fooled Lord knows how many people who love to spread that kind of stuff around.
So the basic story around all this neat stuff to look at is the aforementioned dumb as a post American college student who is visiting Austria to learn of his ancestors, one in particular - a character so nasty he rivaled Vlad The Impaler, called Baron Blood by the locals. The castle he resided in is now being renovated into a hotel for tourists, since locals still won't go near it after dark. This dummy has brought with him a parchment of his grandfather's - apparently the Baron was finally bound by a witch, tortured and killed. She was then burned at the stake (sounds fair to me). The parchment has the original curse because she wanted him to be taken from his grave to be tortured over and over again, so it also has a part that sends him back. So he meets a young woman who's helping renovate the place and although they've known each other what, five minutes? He asks her to meet him there at night to invoke the incantation.
Why? This idiot, believing it will work, wants to find out what his ancestor was like. DUH boy, Baron Blood? Doesn't that give you a clue? Anyway, a certain very annoying and horrible song that fortunately I've never heard all the way through popped in my head at this point:
I know we've just met
And this is crazy
But let's chant this
And raise demons maybe
I'm really sorry about that but if I didn't get it out I'd go insane from it running around my head. So they do, lots of spooky sounds start, they chicken out, say the return incantation and leave. But dumb dumb can't resist trying again. And it works... we see a nasty, bleeding (Really? After centuries?) character dig out from his grave, leaving pools of blood wherever he goes. And they can't put him back 'cause oops, the parchment falls in the fireplace. Damn. The first place he goes is to the doctor (Okay there are some massive duhs to this story) who cleans him up (He's a walking bleeding baked potato for crying out loud!) before he's killed.
More deaths inside the castle prompt them to abandon the idea of a hotel and everything is auctioned off. A mysterious stranger in a wheelchair (Oh come on I guess this one the second I... never mind.) has the winning bid for the castle and grounds, $600,000 in 1972 US money which is $3,296,703.30 in 2012 dollars - still way too damn cheap if you ask me. And he has it 'renovated' in just a few days? Sigh. Okay, I know why critics panned this thing, but if you just concentrate on the art of it and forget the story...
So the dude in the wheelchair asks everyone to his castle for a kind of tour of the completed project. He's got it perfect, even the torture dungeon - and a switch turns on a recording of screams (probably where they got The Well To Hell sounds from). They leave but he wants them to come back. Now all this time the American's little cousin has been saying this guy is the monster but nooooo... she's ignored and more people die. When they finally pay attention, they're screwed 'cause he's gonna get 'em. So of course, the logical thing is to go to a witch (provided they don't burn her too afterward).
This dark spooky chick has the amulet of the witch who first condemned the Baron (How convenient! How thoughtful! How... impossible!) and says the ones he's destroyed have the power to destroy him. Long story short (too late) they're lured back to the castle and just about done for when Elke accidentally drops the amulet on the body of a guy he put in a coffin shaped iron maiden - his eyes open and the Baron starts to look as if he's in pain. The dead man gets up and oh goody, a little zombie action - all those he's killed come into the dungeon and start to... well, we're not shown what but it must be bad 'cause he's screaming louder than his recording...
The three (the American, his uncle and young girl) escape in their 70's Mercedes Benz just in time as his screams reach clear to the sky... okay I don't know about that, the movie just ends.
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