Hello to all those faithfully reading and hopefully enjoying this effort to make even the worst horror movie more watcha... aw, screw that - I'm not that good. If a movie makes you cringe because yet another batch of unlikable teens that are pushing 30 are inching toward their deaths, having a party no one does anywhere ever, a paranormal movie is boring you to tears with unending pans of empty rooms, or thanks to CGI technology when people finally bite it, their blood squirts everywhere except on the victim, the ground, the people next to them... you're in good company and this is the right place for you.

Thursday, June 21, 2012

THIS IS NOT YOUR PARENT'S ZOMBIE MOVIE...









Zombieland (2009)

 Lonely college student Columbus (everyone goes by where they're from, not their names) played by Jesse Eisenberg has so far survived an already taken place zombie apocalypse (supposedly spread by tainted hamburgers) by keeping to a list of rules he is constantly adding to to assure his continued survival. The list is added to all through the movie but not expounded on - you'd have to go to YouTube to watch the outtake commercials to get some of the ones not mentioned in the movie:
  1. "Cardio" 
  2. "Double tap" 
  3. "Beware of bathrooms" 
  4. "Seatbelts" 
  5. "Cast iron skillet" 
  6. "Travel light" 
  7. "Get a kickass partner" 
  8. "Bounty paper towels" 
  9. "Bowling Ball" 
  10. "Don't be a hero." Columbus changes the rule to "Be a hero" at the amusement park, facing his greatest fear, a clown-zombie, to save Wichita and Little Rock. 
  11. "Limber up" 
  12. "Avoid strip clubs" 
  13. "When in doubt, know your way out" 
  14. "The buddy system" 
  15. "Check the back seat" 
  16. "Enjoy the little things" 
  17. "Swiss army knife" 
  18. "Clean socks" 
  19. "Hygiene" 
  20. "Always have backup"
I don't usually care for Woody Harrelson but in this film he has the right amount of macho combined with humor to make watching the partnership between him and Jesse enjoyable. I thought the two girls were unnecessary, but I guess there had to be some hope of a 'next generation' if Jesse could manage to land one of them as a girlfriend... I dunno, they were more annoying than entertaining. That's just my personal opinion.

Other than that, between fabulous scenes of inventive zombie 'kills' (and they're not afraid to call them zombies in this movie) and the hilarious appearance of Bill Murray, who has faked the zombie look so he can still play golf the movie is a hilarious picture that FX has started on their regular 'gee let's get our money out of this' list of movies that they show about once a month. Catch it - you won't be sorry.



                            
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1 comment:

  1. TimJune 27, 2012 at 6:39 PM

    How could you think Wichita and Little Rock are annoying blasphemy lol

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