Movies That Should Have Been Great But Get Mucked Up
Daybreakers (2009)I remember really wanting to see this when it came out. A new twist on the vampire movie: Vampires rule the world. But they ruled it just as stupid as humans did and just as humans are suffering now, so are they in this movie - they're beginning to starve because of 'wasting' their natural resources - humans. They also haven't solved their basic problem: They still cannot survive in sunlight. Crosses and holy water aren't part of this equation.
The year is 2019. Humans were all given a chance to 'assimilate' (no, not as Borgs, as vampires) but those that refused became 'enemies of the state' and were to be captured and farmed as blood supplies for the vampire population. Trouble is, most chose assimilation and few not, so blood supplies, despite their best efforts (too late) to conserve and rebuild their human cattle, are disappearing - they are going to starve - soon. Those that have been deprived are quickly reverting to animal-like states (think more Nosferatu, less Twilight) and are called 'subsiders' - beings the vampires armies are fighting to capture and destroy (Can't waste good blood on bad vampires now, can we?).
Enter Edward Dalton (Ethan Hawke, enjoying massive popularity at the time), head hematologist for a company determined to create a blood substitute, saving the world from starvation. But it's not working. This was funny AND a great bit of gore: They test it out on a soldier and his temperature goes up, he throws up yellow muck (where the hell would that come from?) and starts to seize. They give him some drug and he calms down. They ask him if he's all right. He just says "Ow." - and then his head explodes. I laughed so hard I had to see it three times. It's just my sense of humor. Needless to say they're getting very desperate. Some, including Edward, are drinking animal blood. This leads to another funny: A newscast reports that the main cause of forest fires is vampiric animals wandering into sunlight and bursting into flame, setting everything on fire. Smokey The Bear? I guess he does! THAT was funny! But Edward drinks animal blood for another reason - he sympathizes with the humans, which is his main reason to find a substitute. He thinks humans should be allowed to live free as they used to.
One night driving home he is distracted and gets in a wreck. The people in the other car are all human. The police are coming so he tells the humans he's not going to hurt them, get into his car. They do, he distracts the police, and takes them home. One problem: his brother. Now his brother is a soldier, and turned Edward even though he didn't want it because he 'didn't want to be alone'. Nice guy. He suspects Edward, and narcs on him. Edward and the humans go to an abandoned vineyard which belongs to Audrey (Claudia Karvan) where he meets a miracle: Lionel "Elvis" Cornack (Willem Dafoe) who is an ex-vampire. Ex? Seems while he was driving his boss car one day (he developed the day-system gadgets so vamps can drive in daylight) he, typical of movie drivers, gets distracted and rams a fence surrounding a quarry. He's thrown through the windshield and of course instantly bursts into flames before falling into the water. He survives and discovers he can now be in daylight - he's now human again (first duh of the movie, but okay, I'll take it). Edward is determined to try it. After modifying one of the wine fermenting vats, he exposes himself to the sun twice, dousing himself in wet blankets immediately afterwards. After the second time, his heart starts up again. Ummm, okay. All this time, all they had to do is get a little sun jump-start and this whole thing wouldn't even have existed. A little simplified isn't it? Ah well, it's about to get worse:
Edward's boss Charles (Sam Neill) wants Edward back. Not necessarily for a cure though. He's more interested in money, meaning finding a way to get more human blood - you know, make more money treating the disease than curing it. He 'captures' his own daughter who refused to change and when he forces it, she 'feeds' on herself which causes a rapid transformation into a 'subsider' and she ends up on the wrong end of a sunbeam. Duh.
Edward's brother has also been busy - planning to betray his brother. And he does. Showing up at the vineyard, he bites Elvis - then something strange happens. After Edward sees what 'transformed' blood does to vamps, he has an idea. He goes right into the company to see Charles, who had captured Audrey and was enjoying her 'bouquet' in a brandy glass and told him he was human again but didn't like it. He goads Charles into biting him and we find out what he discovered - transformed blood makes any vampire who drinks it turn human too. He has a cure. He then ties Charles to a chair and sends him down to the first floor where the army is getting ready to strike. He's human and bleeding and they're very, very hungry. And here the whole movie deteriorates. I think they just plain ran out of ideas and didn't know how to end the thing because the story had been good up to now, but it turns into a gorefest.
The troop tear Charles apart and of course, they all turn human. Troop number two show up and seeing troop one are now human... well, you have the idea. This continues for a while, with Edward's brother becoming one of the victims. Edward's research partner shows up and kills every human not yet torn apart. He doesn't want a cure either. A silver dagger makes short work of him and Elvis, Edward and Audrey look as the sun comes up and bathes the building in light. They ride off into the... sunrise.
This could have been really good but there were some problems I had with it:
1. It's supposed to be 2019, but when Edward has a birthday, he says he's turned 35 ten times. Huh? I thought this was a recent thing.
2. The sun is a cure? Then even those who accidentally get burnt should be 'cured' but they're not - and those who burst into flame, how come they're not cured?
2. Even with a blood substitute, how the hell are they going to produce enough for an entire world of vampires? That's a whole lot of... stuff.
3. With all the vampires 'cured', what are they going to eat? With less than 5% of the population being human, no one has been growing food so since they're not drinking blood, they're still going to starve. That really is stupid.
I guess that's why it's science fiction - no reality involved.
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