Hello to all those faithfully reading and hopefully enjoying this effort to make even the worst horror movie more watcha... aw, screw that - I'm not that good. If a movie makes you cringe because yet another batch of unlikable teens that are pushing 30 are inching toward their deaths, having a party no one does anywhere ever, a paranormal movie is boring you to tears with unending pans of empty rooms, or thanks to CGI technology when people finally bite it, their blood squirts everywhere except on the victim, the ground, the people next to them... you're in good company and this is the right place for you.

Friday, June 13, 2014


Eulogy For Miss Murder's Dungeon Of Horror

Well, my hands are blistered from digging and the ground was hard and rocky, but the Facebook page for Miss Murder's Dungeon Of Horror is no more. I was going to give it one more week, but decided enough was enough, and when Facebook just changed the whole page format without telling me (it was one of those "do it now or we'll do it for you in two weeks" kind of thing) it was time to just let it go.

Okay, it's not that dramatic. In fact, it was a 'If a page dies on Facebook and no one ever looked at it, does it make a sound?' kind of thing. Not a freaking person cared. BUT that, while being a bit of an ego deflator, doesn't really make me feel too bad, and hopefully more movies will be added here (and the rest of the blog entries properly categorized and sorted).

What pisses me off though is losing Miss Mayhem - again. Not pissed AT her, but that what should have been a lot of fun for the both of us turned into more of an ordeal - a lot of work with little thanks, no respect, and a good kid being turned off the idea of becoming a reviewer of movies.

Well dammit, you guys have been more than terrific (over 87,000 readers still blows my mind) and, unlike Facebook, this isn't a game of popularity or how much money I can afford to 'buy' my readers - you either read or you don't, it's not a contest. That and it took hours to find content to 'interest' readers - quizzes, trivia, movie information, and of course, links to new movie reviews on this site. All for just about nothing.

Nope, not nothing. Got experience. And ideas. So maybe... well, I've been thinking (uh oh). I whine a lot on my blog ('cause it's my blog and I'll bitch if I want to) about being sick, not being able to do things, not being able to type, blah blah blah... you didn't come here for that. So what about that blog I've been blabbing about, a Fibro blog? There's probably a billion of 'em out there but mine isn't yet. Plus I've been wanting to a comic strip.

This is just an example. For reasons you don't want to
hear, I was not graced with a single piece of her art. Ever.
My grandmother was an artist. She painted some things that frankly scared the hell out of me when I was young, but when it came to seascapes (they lived near the Pacific coast), hers could proudly be on any hotel wall... just kidding, her talent was incredible. She could take a pen, and without hesitation create pictures with tiny dots - it's called pointillism - that were not only detailed and true to scale, but freaking sweet.

I, however, cannot draw a straight line if a knife was held to my throat and a gun to my head (Woof, where did THAT come from?). I tried and failed many times in my youth - a guy I had an incredible, obsessive crush on (it's okay, he's a safe distance now) could not only draw, but could make detailed schematics of things - dunno if he still does. We don't really speak.

This is the extent of my creative juices and is only possible with the grace of Microsoft Paint:

You may laugh now if you wish - and I don't mean at the lame joke. So I found a program called - what? If I name it they'll want publishing credit? Screw that, this week's been corporate crap as it is... 

Point being (FINALLY) that I'm breaking for about a week to keep working on re-arranging the blog so movies, actors, and subjects can be found easier AND learn an incredibly detailed program (on my first attempt my character became a lump of Play-Doh in about 30 seconds) so that I can have my gripe and you can have your movies. Sound fair?