Hello to all those faithfully reading and hopefully enjoying this effort to make even the worst horror movie more watcha... aw, screw that - I'm not that good. If a movie makes you cringe because yet another batch of unlikable teens that are pushing 30 are inching toward their deaths, having a party no one does anywhere ever, a paranormal movie is boring you to tears with unending pans of empty rooms, or thanks to CGI technology when people finally bite it, their blood squirts everywhere except on the victim, the ground, the people next to them... you're in good company and this is the right place for you.

Saturday, June 22, 2013

WATCHIN' JUNK, SHIRKING MY DUTIES AND HOLDING OFF EASTERN MOVIES






Quarantine 2: Terminal (2011)

This movie, which I kind of put off seeing, is the sequel to Quarantine, released in 2008 (and reviewed on this blog 6/20/12). I watched the first one several times despite it being 'found footage hand held camera' stuff that was mostly in the dark. It was still a great story, even in the dark, shaky get-a-headache-in-five-minutes kind of way. It followed a woman reporter and her cameraman as they spend a night at a fire station, to give people an idea of what they go through in a night.

In the first movie, a medical call at an apartment building quickly turns into a nightmare, as the people are sealed in, sealed off, and get infected one by one in what turns out to be a domestic terrorist-type situation where they were developing a super virus - one similar to rabies but symptoms take minutes instead of days. And you know once you have symptoms, it's all over - there's no cure.

What I didn't know was that Quarantine was a remake of the Spanish zombie film REC, of the three-movie series (that I can't find 1 and 2 of and just watched 3). But the sequel is not REC 2, but instead has a different plot and setting.

When I saw the movie poster I was thinking 'zombies on a plane' type of scenario which was not appealing. Fortunately it's not like that. As the movie starts you find yourself checking out all the characters - anyone with a cough, or looking ill, or anything is suspect. This flight is leaving LA - the site of the previous movie - and of course one of them is either sick or carrying it or else we won't have a movie so that was no surprise. 

And figuring out what's what doesn't take long either. A 'kindergarten teacher' has brought a small animal carrier aboard that holds several 'gerbils' in it that he has tucked away. One very overweight guy sticks his finger in there - DUH. He gets bit. Now we know.

Once in the air we get 'introduced' to the ancillary characters but we pretty much know who's going down and maybe who won't. It's kind of useless to list names as each one can go in a second. Fortunately, the first to get 'sick' does it quickly (our portly gentleman) and goes berserk and attacks people - forcing the plane to make an emergency landing that dislodges a bunch of stuff and chaos reigns. And now they're in Las Vegas. These people just can't catch a break.

After a few more casualties, we find our surviving group inside, not the terminal, but the employee area as all doors were locked (since in the air on one of the passengers laptop we saw scenes from the first movie, the CDC probably knew the infection was on board) and all they can do is try to figure out how to get through this maze of walkways and buildings to somehow get out. 

Taking control is the remaining flight attendant Jenny, who tries to keep everyone calm, but when armed CDC soldiers come in and shoot those who resist, they panic. And those (along with the CDC soldiers) shoot their way out of the building, all, including the soldiers are quickly shot down. One is only shot in the leg and manages to come back inside. That's when all are told that this is not the doing of the CDC, instead there has been evidence of terrorism - it's actually Homeland Security.

A  minor travelling on his own, George, had tried to tell Jenny that the 'gerbils' the teacher claimed to have in the carrier were lab rats 'cause they have tails but she doesn't believe him. Trust me people, when you're in a horror movie and a kid tries to tell you something LISTEN UP! Geez, this happens in horror movies all the time - how many would live through one if they just listened to kids?

One of the passengers is a medic (of course) and she realized that the HS guys didn't know how to treat this either as the few passengers that allowed them to get injections to 'help' them were each given something different - meaning they had no idea what would work and what wouldn't - all the people are now themselves lab rats.

As they die one by one, they come upon an office and hide out for a bit - and the 'teacher' makes his move. The kid was absolutely right - the 'teacher' is a terrorist. He makes some lame speech about how man needs a good plague to wipe out the majority of the population for the good of the earth - yeah right. He's been bit but ain't gonna let the rabies get to him - he's got the antidote. 

This is the flinchworthy part of the movie - he's got to inject it not only in the spot he's been bit, but into his eye. And they show that REAAAAAAAL close up. <flinch> But I watched it, mainly because I hoped it hurt - he deserved it. He then grabs the kid and takes off on his own, leaving the remainder to fend for themselves.

There are quite a few heart-pounding moments 'cause these infected suckers are FAST, nimble, and impervious to pain. The goal is to find a tunnel that will lead out of the hangar and building because it's obvious that Homeland Security isn't going to let them out - and soon they start hearing and seeing explosions - HS apparently is just going to make everything go away.

As I had already guessed, the 'antidote' didn't work - in fact, the idiot terrorist only became a much faster, fiercer rabid idiot, and the ones left - Jenny the flight attendant and George the kid are racing to keep away from him. Jenny had gotten hold of one of the HS's thermal goggles so now we're getting that 'in the dark shaky footage' stuff that was most of the first movie. After dispatching the terrorist they make it to a small vent tunnel that should lead to the outside. 

George is terrified of small spaces and the dark (who isn't?) and so Jenny gives him the goggles so he can see. Putting them on he sees that she has been hiding a small wound on her side - she tells him she's infected but he can make it.

Coming to the end of the tunnel there are rebar blocking the exit but he's small enough to get out. Not Jenny - which is good because she's totally gone by this time so it looks like our little smart guy is the only survivor. He drops the goggles and walks wearily towards the Vegas strip. Our last scene is through the dropped goggles a vision of the unseen kitty cat, who was supposed to be in a carrier but the old lady kept letting her out. The cat is infected - and making its way to the strip and possibly to another sequel.