Hello to all those faithfully reading and hopefully enjoying this effort to make even the worst horror movie more watcha... aw, screw that - I'm not that good. If a movie makes you cringe because yet another batch of unlikable teens that are pushing 30 are inching toward their deaths, having a party no one does anywhere ever, a paranormal movie is boring you to tears with unending pans of empty rooms, or thanks to CGI technology when people finally bite it, their blood squirts everywhere except on the victim, the ground, the people next to them... you're in good company and this is the right place for you.

Monday, June 3, 2013



Horror, like life, seems to have gone through cycles. We had monster movies like Dracula, Frankenstein, Creature From The Black Lagoon, Godzilla, etc. Then it seemed to gravitate towards the creepy, as well as, uh, spin offs? of the original creatures such as House Of Wax, My Son The Vampire, Bride Of The Monster, Night Of The Demon, The Undead, etc.

The 60's brought us campier (read lighter) type horror, as well as movies that experimented and played with us to try to bring chills: Thirteen Ghosts, Circus Of Horrors, Dementia 13, House Of The Damnned, Something Weird, Rosemary's Baby and of course the almighty Night Of The Living Dead.

Then the 70's seemed to gravitate toward anything with 'Blood' in the title, lots of supernatural movies, not so much creature features (and a lot of Mario Bava's greats): Blood Of Ghastly Horror, Death Line, The Devil's Rain, Shivers, Alice Sweet Alice, Eaten Alive, Audrey Rose, the huge movie The Exorcist, etc.

If I've left out some obvious greats, it's only because this would become a book and I'm just throwing random titles out there to make a bit of a point. That point was that horror had seemingly nowhere to go. I mean they could keep making the same stuff with new stars and new special effects for the newbies going to the movies in the 1980's but science fiction, thrillers and disaster movies were definitely pushing horror in a corner. I mean we had Star Wars and Indiana Jones now for crying out loud - as well as Eyes Of Laura Mars (that one freaked me out a little as a kid), and of course Invasion Of The Body Snatchers - which actually could be considered a horror-science fiction-thriller. So what was left?

The slasher movie was kind of born then - and some rehashing of older ideas. The 80's showed some creativity alongside some tired, obvious devices that turned us away from the theater to TV. At least it seemed to me that it did. For some of the 80's I lived across the street from a drive-in theater (sadly gone now) and it seemed to lag a bit as far as the cars showing up every weekend.

So let's look at some of the great (and horrible) movies of the 80's - at least for as long as I can stand 'em. Some were purposely campy, like Motel Hell and Killer Klowns From Outer Space, but there were some truly awful ones too - a whole lot of them. I promise not to do the whole catalog though. I do want to keep  my faithful readers - and my sanity.

If some greats get left out, like Evil Dead, American Werewolf In London, etc. it's because, darn it, I've already reviewed them. I've GOT to get that index up and working.