Hello to all those faithfully reading and hopefully enjoying this effort to make even the worst horror movie more watcha... aw, screw that - I'm not that good. If a movie makes you cringe because yet another batch of unlikable teens that are pushing 30 are inching toward their deaths, having a party no one does anywhere ever, a paranormal movie is boring you to tears with unending pans of empty rooms, or thanks to CGI technology when people finally bite it, their blood squirts everywhere except on the victim, the ground, the people next to them... you're in good company and this is the right place for you.

Wednesday, May 8, 2013


American Zombie (2008)

Want to have all the life and fun sucked completely out of watching a zombie film? Here ya go.

This is supposedly a mockumentary that also claims to be comedy/horror in that it is also a gorefest. It may be the first but that's about it. There's nothing gory, horrific (except how boring it is) or funny about it. A group of filmmakers decide to document life among the living dead making their homes in Los Angeles. That's it. That's the movie.

If I wanted to listen to a 'high functioning' zombie describe their workday... wait a minute, I have. I was in the work force for over 20 years - I've heard these same stories countless times, why the hell would I want to hear it in a movie from zombies who just look like people with really bad complexions?

That is all. You may return to your regularly scheduled fun.